Hermione's Adventure
by grungaphobia
Summary: Crack at its finest. Random Rambling. First story, flames allowed and accepted because this is a horrible Crack Fic. Very AU, and a lot of smut.


**Warning : Random Crack and Unedited everything**

 **Everything here written was for pure pleasure of writing boredom**

So there's Percy, the main character of the amazing PJ series and he's all like, " OMG I AM THE OVERLORD OF EVERYTHING! Mind you that was three exclamation marks I am that amazing."

Then comes Hawrry Powtter, the amazing lord of the Harry Potter series and he's all like, " Nuuuuu! I am."

But get this, they're all kids. So Hermione, Ginny, Annabeth, and all the chicks and guys from the two series come in and they're all like " OMG it's the hotties! I could like totally faint, catch me!"

Now if this was a Naruto-Inuyashaiverse then I would've added Kagome, Naruto, and Sasuke because who doesn't love a Kagome sandwich. But this isn't the main plot of this story so they're down into the trash. Bye bye fangirls, bye bye fanboys and anime readers.

Right now, Harry has this amazing body because he just works out a lot, okay? But his face is all messed up and pimply and everything. Plus, it spews out really disgusting pus. But Percy, on the other hand, is so fabuli-cious that everyone just loves him so much! Excluding his fat belly and everything cuz he's Percy and he's the overlord of everything!

So then here comes Hermione, with her pretty little bad girl clothes that does not match her attitude. Right now, she's all like 'WTF!' because she's wearing these ugly black platform heels with ten inches on them. And she's wearing this really revealing corset thing which is so weird.

Annabeth, on the other hand, is dressed like a couch potato. Literally. She's inside this sack of random and drinking sake (like Tsunade.) But she can't stop drinking because she feels like it's necessary.

So these four characters meet and they hit off. Hermione with Percy, and Annabeth with Potter. Yeah, weird couple and they discover it's not the best. Since Hermione is such a big whore, she's like " Bejesus I want Annabeth gone!"

And they're like, " I don't wanna share just Hermione, so let's add Ginny to the picture!"

But poor Ginny isn't physically active so they're all like, " Ew, wtf? She doesn't even wanna play with us like what~"

So they're crying and enter Nico Di Angelo without Thalia(Thigh-lia hahahaha I couldn't resist) his 'best' buddy. And Nico's like, " Hey what's better than having friends? Eh, is anyone gonna answer me?"

Hermione giggled, " I donut know, like I think, uhhhhh... Since I'm so smart I have to know the answer!"

Annabeth is mad and she comes back, slapping her in the face with a sake bottle, " Friends with Benefits, you idiot!"

And they're all like, " Ooooh! Girl fight~"

Annabeth and Hermione turn toward all of them and give all of them a good beating before returning to their 'girl' fight, with punches and kicks in places that they should not go. Meanwhile, Ginny is all like sitting there like another couch potato. She grew fat from drinking so much rum.

So now Snape enters the picture and he's like, "eeehhhh! What's this? Am I missing something?"

But of course he can't do that, so we're going through a time machine to go back in time and re-do that. So now he's like.

" I AM THE EVIL SNAPEY SNAPE SNAPE AND YA'LL GONNA BOW DOWN TO ME OR I'M GOING TO CHOKE YA'LL WITH A POTION!"

But then the biggest slut of them all, Thigh-lia comes in and spreads her legs open to Snape and _winks_ at the greasy hair dude. Now everyone is choking to death and they are all believing that the world has finally come to an end.

Suddenly, Draco Malfoy comes with his sexiness and sweeps Hermione, the whore, off her feet. The oblivious man is oblivious to everyone because he's so oblivious and stupid. So now he's proposing to Hermione with his platinum hair.

And of course Hermione loves to cheat people so she says, " YAS!"

They get married right there and then. The ceremony was grand because Draco is so rich and he's oblivious to the heated stares that Hermione is giving to all the Percy Jackson boys. And Harry too, because she loves his amazing body and not his face.

The entire time she was thinking of what she was going to do when she got home and she can't help but feel disgusted of herself because she's such a whore. But then she feels good that at least she's not as much as a slut as Thigh-lia who charges nothing to have fun.

However, our dear Hermione doesn't know that Draco is also a man-slut. IN Fact, he's the biggest man-slut around and takes advantage of everyone around him. So he's exactly like a girl version of our whore, Hermione.

So during the reception, which Narcissa Malfoy was crying in, Draco had fun with Lacy and every Aphrodite girl. Meanwhile, Hermione had fun with every boy of the Percy Jackson universe. They didn't mind at all that the biggest whore and slut gotten married. That meant double the fun.

The two of them finally get 'home' to a trashcan and Draco says, " I donut wanna spend money on a house so we gonna live in a dump."

And Hermione is like, " What, like wha do you, like mean?"

" You heard me."

" Like what, what do you, like mean? I, like, married you, like for money."

So Draco goes to his oblivious facade, "Really? I thought you loved me!"

Hermione slaps him on the face until his blood vessels break so now he has this ugly bruise on his face caused by this. Of course he used his magic and heals it before being oblivious again and sits on his face and fart. It was really smelly and Draco faints from all of the commotion.

And then Percy and Harry crawl from under the dump with Thigh-lia stuck between them.

" You, like live, like here, like too?" Percy asked.

" Like yeah!" Hermione yelled.

So now they're living all together in a trash can. So Nico is sitting there one day and sulking finds them in a trash can having fun. And Nico is like, " EW! OMF! THAT'S SO SICKOOOOO! Ew my best friends are all sluts and whores and man-hoes!"

 **Done Rambling**


End file.
